I feel like im sitting completely still, unable to move or speak. The rest of the world passing me by in fast forward.
Our routine, everyones routine has return to normal and it feels so wrong.
The 'i should be's' are killing me, i should be having a cold dinner eating one handed while breastfeeding my baby, i should be snuggling in my bed feeding my baby, i should be putting my baby in the second seat in the pram, i should have a totally trashed house because my hours are so full with a child, toddler and a new born.
But im having hot meals, my house is spotless, my breasts leak the goodness that should be nourishing my baby...
I really need to stop with the i should be's.
i've missed Jack alot today, nothing particular about today has triggered it.
3 weeks since we saw our son and kissed him goodbye.
i need my sparkle back, i feel so flat and lifeless at the moment. i;m still tired, not as achey, but still so so tired. trying to eat well and drink heaps of water, slowly getting back into excersize, trying to get my body back to what it was. SPD is still lingering but not nearly as bad as it was thank goodness. hopefully my body is kind to me and it doesnt return next time.
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